


so i closed the curtains

by shikae (39smooth)



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Gen, M/M, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-11
Updated: 2013-05-11
Packaged: 2017-12-11 12:40:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/798832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/39smooth/pseuds/shikae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jongin wants, Jongin craves, Jongin desires, and it burns over in his need to press trembling fingertips into warm skin, trailing down curved collarbones and chapped lips and soft, dark hair.</p>
            </blockquote>





	so i closed the curtains

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: Leessang - So I Turned Off The TV

_(I love you so much, so I turned off the tv.)_

Bright eyes, a wide smile.

Jongin craves.

_(I love you so much, so I closed the curtains.)_

He meets Do Kyungsoo in a flurry of movement, unplanned accidents and little run-ins in training rooms, empty studios, the cafeteria, the dorms. It seems to be fated, it does, the way Kyungsoo’s lips, red from the winter cold or the summer heat, quirk up at the sides in the slightest hint of a smile. It seems to be destined, it does, the way Jongin gifts his own grin in return, bending over to help Kyungsoo pick up his things; it’s always Kyungsoo who drops his bag, his music sheets, his lunch, his toothbrush.

He meets Do Kyungsoo in a whirlwind of times, and it doesn’t matter to Jongin. Bright eyes, a wide smile. It makes Jongin want to run a thousand miles and spend all the air in his lungs on words meant for Kyungsoo alone. It makes Jongin want to know Kyungsoo in all the best and the worst ways imaginable.

He meets Do Kyungsoo in the middle of a song, a song that only the two of them know, a song that blows past the others like a breeze in the middle of the night, a song that Jongin knows by heart, etched on Kyungsoo’s lips, Kyungsoo’s eyes, Kyungsoo’s heart.

_(I want to show you till this night dawns.)_

Jongin knows it’s not perfect, it can’t possibly be perfect.

It’s hiding smiles and quick glances and stolen brushes of skin against skin in hallways and on stages and in the quiet of their own dorm. They cannot indulge, but Jongin wants to. Jongin wants to steal him away and sink himself in the depths of his own affections, the feelings he’s bound to stuff back down into the soles of his sneakers, the feelings he has and always will have.

_(Seeing the ‘me’ who’s different from yesterday will probably make you cry.)_

He bends the hearts of girls and boys he doesn’t even know, and bends his own spine in return in flashing choreography, twists and turns, bows on the stages of far and near and beyond. Jongin puts up his act for everyone bar Kyungsoo, and when they crash in a meeting of song and dance, Jongin knows that this is going to hurt him far worse than it’ll hurt Kyungsoo.

_(You’re so adorable, you always make my heart flutter.)_

But then Kyungsoo smiles, and laughs, and makes noodles for the whole group, and whacks Chanyeol on the head when he borrows Kyungsoo’s laptop without asking, and plays boxing games with Suho whenever he asks, and sings till he’s hoarse when Baekhyun meekly asks for help with new songs, and fusses over Sehun like he’s a little kid, and smiles and laughs and loves.

He’s beautiful. Jongin knows it.

_(I love you so much, I want to give you all of me, I want to have all of you.)_

Jongin wants this, wants this as much as he wants the stage, lights, action, wants Kyungsoo like there’s no tomorrow. Jongin wants, Jongin craves, Jongin  _desires_ , and it burns over in his need to press trembling fingertips into warm skin, trailing down curved collarbones and chapped lips and soft, dark hair, and Jongin wants to have all of Kyungsoo, to make him arch and cry and whisper his name,  _Jongin Jongin Jongin_ , over and over and over, and Jongin wants to kiss him, kiss him with the ferocity of a thousand brilliant explosions, kiss and mouth and nip at the skin under his ear, lick his way over the crook of his hip, leave bruises under his knees and over his ankles and the small of his back, and Jongin just wants to  _know_  him.

_(Please stop it, stop it.)_

Heady wishes and little yearnings, Jongin tells himself to end. He knows it won’t turn out well, he knows it’ll probably end up being terrible, for him, for Kyungsoo, for the group. But it’s the itch he can’t scratch out, the white noise he can’t block out, the ache he has in him.

_(I want to embrace you closer.)_

One night, Jongin stands at the doorway to their shared room, watching Kyungsoo pull off his socks and toss them aside, watching Kyungsoo reach for his unfinished novel and thumb his way to where his last dog-eared page is, watching Kyungsoo settle into his usual pattern.

“I can’t sleep like this,” says Jongin suddenly, and Kyungsoo looks at him, and his voice feels unused and weird, and the words get stuck in his throat, y _ou’re so beautiful_ , and he can’t bring himself to say anything else, but the look in Kyungsoo’s eyes tell Jongin that he knows, he knows what Jongin wants to say, he knows what Jongin wants to feel, and it shows in the way he exhales softly. Jongin finally catches himself, and continues, “I’ll—be regretful, if I let the night go like this.”

What he really means is,  _don’t say no tonight_.

He wonders whether that desperation shows through in his face.

Kyungsoo looks at him, and for a second, Jongin really believe it, believes that Kyungsoo is going to say no, say no and turn over and read his book and go back to his usual pattern as if nothing’s disrupted it and Jongin will return to his quiet longing.

But Kyungsoo smiles. Bright eyes, a wide smile.

He puts his book on the floor, pulls his sheets down a little with his feet, and smiles again. “I’ll think about it. Now turn off the lights.”

Jongin does, and he accepts the silent invitation, and crawls in beside Kyungsoo in his bed, in the dark feeling his way through to Kyungsoo’s heart, feet knocking together, hands curling together. Jongin breathes against Kyungsoo’s neck, counting the breaths, _one two three_ , and Kyungsoo presses his nose against Jongin’s forehead, mouthing the words against his temple,  _I love you too, Jongin_.

_(I love you so much, so I turned off the tv.)_

Jongin smiles.

_(I love you so much, you make my heart flutter.)_

-


End file.
